What is transference in therapy?

The short answer

Transference is when a person unconsciously redirects feelings and expectations from an important relationship, often with a parent, onto someone else, classically their therapist. A client might feel the same need for approval, anger or fear of abandonment toward the therapist that they once felt toward a parent. The therapist just asked how your week was; your nervous system heard your father asking about your report card.

Whose idea was this

Sigmund Freud described transference in the 1890s and 1900s and came to see it as central to psychoanalysis. It's still a core idea in psychodynamic therapy, and therapists of many other schools recognize it too, usually without the cigar.

Why therapists love it (professionally)

Transference brings old patterns into the room where they can be noticed and talked about in real time. When a client realizes “I'm reacting to you the way I reacted to my mother,” that insight can loosen the pattern in their other relationships too. That's the “breakthrough” our play-by-play announcers get so worked up about, complete with instant replay.

Countertransference: the therapist has a mother too

Countertransference is the therapist's own emotional reaction to the client, shaped by the therapist's history. Therapists are trained to notice it, often with help from supervision, so it informs rather than hijacks the work.